Your Ceremony, behind the scenes
You’ve said yes to the person you love, and now a thousand questions are coming your way.
As a bilingual French/English Secular Ceremony Officiant, I support couples in Bordeaux, Nouvelle-Aquitaine, throughout France and abroad with their wedding ceremonies, elopements and vow renewals. Here are the questions I’m asked most often, with simple, jargon-free answers. For the legal side (town hall, documents, foreign couples), download the free guide.
Before you start
No. In France, only a civil wedding at the mairie (town hall) is legally binding. The ceremony I create is symbolic: it’s the personal, emotional part of your day, held wherever you choose. Many couples do both. The paperwork for foreign couples varies, so please check with the mairie and your embassy or consulate.
I’m used to speaking in front of an audience, and I know the rhythm and pauses that let a ceremony breathe. I take care of the preparation and the timing, liaise with your families, and write a script with you that reflects who you are. I manage the flow of the day so you can be fully present, free of worries. All you have to do is live the moment.
The first conversation is relaxed and comes with no commitment. You tell me your story, your wishes and your worries, and I’ll tell you honestly whether we’re a good fit to work together. The first meeting is free, so please do ask for it.
The earlier the better, especially for the high season (May to September) and for destinations outside France. For a bespoke Secular Ceremony, allow several months in advance, which gives us time to move forward together without stress. A shorter timeline is still possible depending on my availability: write to me and we’ll look at it together.
Ceremonies start at €1,500 for a local elopement and €2,000 for other ceremonies. The final price depends on the format, travel and any extras, each quoted after our free first call. A deposit secures your date.
The wedding planner coordinates the organisation of your day: vendors, venues, schedule. The ceremony officiant takes care of the heart of the day: the words, the pacing and the rituals of the ceremony. The two roles complement each other very well. I’ve done both, and I’m happy to work hand in hand with your planner or your venue.
Yes. A secular ceremony is a free-form ceremony: it can include spirituality, family traditions, a sacred text that matters to you, or none of these. What matters is that every guest feels at ease and that you recognise yourselves in every sentence.
The Big Day
Yes, of course. You choose your comfort level: wedding vows read aloud, or repeated after me line by line. There’s no wrong way to say “I love you”: there are simply lots of different ways to say it.
A bespoke ceremony script grows out of your story: how you met, what made you laugh, what helped you grow. Using my questionnaires, your anecdotes and those of your loved ones, I write a ceremony that reflects who you are. You’ll be able to find all of this again after the ceremony.
Yes, and it’s often what guests remember most, though it depends on what you want. A funny memory, a little wink or one partner’s quirk can add warmth and authenticity, as long as it stays kind. Laughter relaxes the room and makes the emotion feel more genuine. We find the right balance together, depending on your wishes and your guests.
They can read a text, bring a symbolic object, say a few words or play a part in a ritual. To keep things smooth, we prepare in advance what everyone will say or do, and I guide everyone on the day. Children can take part too, depending on their age and what’s possible.
I’m bilingual in French and English and I’m happy to lead the ceremony in both languages, alternating sentences or key moments, so that nobody feels left out. It’s ideal for international weddings and mixed-nationality couples. For other languages, we can plan a reading by a loved one, or a translated booklet for your guests.
Most often: welcoming the guests, the couple’s entrance, a few opening words, your story, perhaps some readings and one or more rituals, the exchange of vows and rings, then the closing words and the exit to music. Everything can be changed: together we build what speaks to you.
A place, a promise
Yes, whatever your nationality. For a vow renewal, the questionnaires are different: they are adapted to your experience as a married couple, whether you’re celebrating 5, 10 or 25 years of marriage.
Yes. An elopement is an intimate wedding, just the two of you or with a few witnesses, in a place you dream of: a beach, the mountains, a charming village. For your destination wedding, I can travel to lead your symbolic ceremony, in French or in English, and help you imagine the place, the flow and the key moments. I’ve already celebrated ceremonies abroad, notably in Portugal.
The symbolic ceremony has no legal standing, wherever it takes place.
A legal marriage depends on the rules of the chosen country, which vary a lot (residency requirements, documents, waiting periods). Two approaches are common: marrying legally with the authorities of the country where you elope, or marrying at a town hall (mairie) in France before or after, then celebrating your elopement freely. If one of you is French and marries abroad, they will typically need a certificate of capacity to marry (certificat de capacité à mariage), issued before the ceremony by the French embassy or consulate, followed by a transcription of the marriage certificate so the marriage is officially recorded in France (official source: justice.fr, marriage of a French national abroad). Always check the rules of the chosen country with its embassy or consulate before booking.
Write to me: your first meeting is free, with no commitment.
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